Starpilot has one of those...

Here's my review for every ZZZV album:

"Fucking incredible."

Feel free to quote me.

We need a guy wearing a mexican wrestling mask who writes ruthless reviews.

What im trying to say, there has been like 25 good critics EVER. Who wants that in the chip scene? Unless youre lester bangs, gtfo.

Or an artist that doesnt need the approval of others in order to create art

I just want to say that demarko does a really good job of this, and I wish we had more people writing stuff like this about chip releases:

http://tuned.demarko.org/post/102338265 … ace-rocket

I wouldn't mind doing reviews of chip-dance music (that's all I'm really qualified to speak about) but in a small scene no one wants to be the guy that bashed that one release everyone likes. There's a reason artists are not reviewers. You need reviewers that aren't trying to get people to like them in the scene.

So who's willing to be the bad guy and give bad reviews when they're called for?  Put another way:  Who wants to waste their time talking about something they don't like?  Not me.  That's got to be one of the biggest reason every chip review/description you read is just glowing and sycophantic.

Ahahahaha.  No, that's the kind of album description I wish people would shy away from.

I agree. Something like this review, it won't kill you to read it, and you're actually helping draw someone's attention.

I think this is true to a degree, but at the same time, so many releases are put out with such poor descriptions I often can't tell if I even *want* to stream it.  Telling me that something might melt my face off or that something is diverse doesn't actually tell me anything about a release.  I mean, even the best chip netlabels are guilty of this.  If you go to Pause right now, you'll see:

"Giant Claw - Tunnel Mind.  If you liked Midnight Murder and Erasers Fantasy then this is right up your alley!"

Ok.  Cool.  What if I didn't even listen to those? 

Maybe the chip scene doesn't even need full Pitchfork-length reviews.  One weekly article with a few sentences about several releases (actually describing the music) and commenting on the level of quality might be nice.

More stuff like "Chip Bass Monthly" would be good.  Doesn't have to be genre/style specific like that but the format is good.

Example link:  http://generationbass.com/2011/10/28/ch … onthly-10/

tldr

I think in an era of tldr and the ability to simply stream a record, reviews aren't really relevant, i mean look at how many people hate on pitchfork? But if the right writer came along, who knows?

I would be a reader. That is absolutelly something that the scene misses: reviews. It's hard to have the will to listen an album because the composer of it announced it as "my second lsdj effort". But if one writes a review commenting it, there would be more general interest, I think.

Another job successfully foisted off on someone else!