http://soundcloud.com/iqbal-nak-melodic … e-of-angel
My first post in this forum.. 
My chip song and i hope you'll enjoy it, Im a newbie so critic me ok? 
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Critic is on it's way:
Wow, 7 Sounds on your Soundcloud an they are all slightly the same (for sure your using the same Instruments over and over again).
Particular the NoiseChannel in here gets really enoying. It never stops and i'm pretty sure (even i can tell with my shitty skills) that it's only 1 or 2 Phrases in the NoiseChannel that are looping for the whole track. And even if you variate it at some point my brain stopped paying attention cause the song feels like a whole loop.
Also i don't really dig the PU Instruments.
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clovis CA
i agree with the noise channel. try utilizing the wav channel and going alittle more in depth with your instruments. the right sound goes a long way. the noise too, shape it and youll be able to make it have a decent sound, but take it out of that same loop... tbh it sounded like random notes were punched in durring certain segments... not totally awful for a first time though, keep it up and youll be the next smiletron or something (:
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i think you should just keep pumping out new songs, you have a promising technique and a lot to learn, don't get hung up asking for CC on this one track. make more. experiment. evolve.
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Needs variation, pulse/wav/kit kick drums, anything to make the synthesis more interesting. The melody is nice. Build it up and make an epic drippidy drop. Listen to some music you like and how it sounds... pay attention to the instruments, try to emulate those instruments or make your own. Read the LSDJ manual... Experiment.
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.FILTHadelphia
I'm pretty sure all the songs on your Soundcloud are the same song. I got through about 5 seconds of each, skipped ahead and heard the same thing I did last time. This needs work as in demolish and rebuild.
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babylon
sounds like most people when they start. heres my advice. go to google and read everything about lsdj. manuals, tutorials, patches. read all of it. seriously. then make a song that feels like it took forever to write. ask for critisism on that song and see what people say. if your still having fun when these tasks are completed pat yourself on the back. its exciting to share what your working on but when your song has a lack of variation it shows that you have a long way to go with understanding the program and everyone in here can spot it quick. oh and if anyones responses seem cold take it with a grain of salt, theyre not usually trying to be.
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I feel a bit like I could respond to every thread in the constructive criticism forum with this answer - reading up on manuals/etc. is great, but the best way to learn is to just keep making tracks. If you're motivated to create music you'll naturally improve by discovering new methods and getting inspired to seek out specific techniques. It might seem crazy but it's the way all the best chipmusic artists (and musicians of all types) learnt their trade!
I've definitely heard worse "first tracks" but they tend to have the same problems. You'll know when you've come up with something ace, trust me!
Last edited by Stevens (Jun 13, 2012 1:00 am)
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Sweden
I don't know what to think of the advice telling you to read the manual, but personally I think that's the least of your concerns. Any of that will be useless unless you can make a good song. My tip is to give this one a couple of weeks of silence, then listen to it again and analyze it. Is it still good? Did it sound good to begin with? Is it as good as [some song you like]. Why is/isn't it? What is it that's good about [some song you like]? Make a lot of songs like Stevens says, then listening to them with a discriminating ear will come naturally.
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The Multiverse ::: [CA, Sac]
Pumping out songs is all well and good, but not grasping what you're doing wrong in the first place can make it all pointless.
Melody: it comes off random and disjointed. At this point it's more bleeps than a consistent melody. Imagine a melody you can sing or humm. If it's catchy and gets stuck in your head then you're on the right track.
Synthesis: you're sticking with the same sounds for the entire song, big no no. It gets annoying and repetitive. In addition to writing one melody with one pu. Write another with a different sound. Alternate between melodies and do call-and-response. There's so many combinations.
Percussion: the noise channel has sooo much potential, in lsdj. You're squandering it by making it do 2 patterns with one sound. In my first lsdj song, I got a kick analog, hihat, openhat, and snare out of it. Just play around with it. There's so much you can do with it.
Commands: nothing really going on with these. The occasional pitchbend but that's really it. Use tables, pwm, all kinds of stuff to enhance your points.
Structure: try doing more audible verses and choruses. There needs to be a difference. Maybe in percussion or synth or rhythm or the list goes on and on.
Listen to other music, not even just chipmusic. Make note of what makes a song a song. Then spend time on each of these points and bring a new song to the table for me to judge. You have the potential, just work hard at it and don't rush it. 
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babylon
hmm. i agree with making lots of tracks. that shit will help. but i guess the manual/tutorial suggestion comes from assuming he knows what he's going for and needs help with interpreting it in lsdj. anything else just seems like help for creating music in general which theres a million ways to do. idk just have fun with it and quit when it feels like work. the rest comes naturally.