but also
i will never forget the time i played something live for the first time at a blip pre-party open mic. i hadn't met any chipscene people yet, for the 1st half hour or so i was too timid to introduce myself to anyone and i was mostly ignored. but right after my name was drawn and i played, all sorts of people from the crowd came out of the woodwork to greet me.
i specifically remember some lumbering big-haired hulk of a dude charging at me to shake my hand and then realizing it was derris-kharlan. simultaneously i felt 1) humbled that this guy even knew who i was beforehand, and 2) fock am i going to die in the next 30 seconds. it was pretty surreal.