Where to start - first off, as a first LSDJ, this sounds like you've been doing it for at the very least a couple months. I have no feedback as to where you can improve the setup other than to my ears it sounds perfect quality wise - very little background noise - but composition wise, that's where I can help. Near the end the song goes very wonky right? I love that. That makes my ear-loins hunger for more aural sex like this song.
The beginning sounds a little bit boring to the sound-feeling head-holes I have. I would recommend putting a little more oomph into the beginning. But other than that, you're good. Just try to think of a better hook in the beginning.

Have a beautiful day, kind stranger!