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I get it, I get it.

this is an april 1st

Parachuting is for pussies

There's hardly very few sound systems at clubs etc. where stereo can be apreciated, therefore, this method is good. Also, you can stereo separate/image each channel if you so wish so.
You can also precisely EQ the channels, you can boost more the bass on one and more the treble on the other.

Yeah, right

That's because they are all a bunch of drunk fucks!

Actually, I wouldn't assert that it's not an issue at all in NYC unless someone organizing shows there says so. Bar deposits for a weekend day in NYC are fucking expensive, so perhaps whoever makes shows has a deal that avoids this (you don't specify which sow you are referring to) or no problem with bar turnout since the venue works different, like playing in a bar which already has a set amount of people going every weekend and you just chipping in (no pun intended) to play for a while.

Your problem may have to do with the age of your show population or with the fact that the people that go to your show are simply cheap asses. All ages shows usually impact on bar consumption if you get more kids in, free shows usually attract the attention to people that doesn't want to pay a dime for anything.

Organizing events is not a simple task but it's very rewarding wen done right.

Sorry to go offtopic again ;P